In the middle of crazy finals studying, God shows me glimpses of His love.
Lyndsey sent me this song this past week and I was very blessed by it (Thanks Lyndsey! I <3 you)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoC1ec-lYps&feature=player_embedded
How He Loves
He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane
I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of wind and mercy
When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by Glory
And I realize just how beautiful you are and how great your affections are for me
Oh how he loves us, so
Oh how he loves us, how he loves us so
We are his portion and he is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in his eyes
If grace is an ocean we're all sinking
So, heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way
He loves us
Oh how he loves us
Oh how he loves us
Oh how he loves
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Ready to Receive?
An article that I submitted to The Steadfast, Talbot's newsletter:
"To give is better than to receive," is a statement our mothers taught us growing up so that we would be good, generous people. It is a true statement, but at the same time, there is a place for receiving. Being in the Holy Land was a powerful experience, and I will take all of the sights and sounds of Israel with me for life. Yet, the most memorable experience of the trip for me was the lesson of receiving.
A few days before the end of the trip, along with many others in our group, I came down with the stomach flu. During this time, I had to depend on others to care for me. My roommate got me water, crackers, bread -- all the essentials for someone on a limited diet due to the stomach flu. She even did my last-minute souvenir shopping. People checked up on me, took pictures and videos for me, gave me massages, encouraged and prayed for me. I was greatly blessed by the love I felt by the members of our group while I was sick, and realized that this is what it means for the body of Christ to function as the family of God.
Thankfully, the resort we stayed at in En Gev was situated right along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, so I was able to enjoy the beautiful view from my bedroom window. Lying there looking at the Sea of Galilee, I meditated on how Jesus came not for the well, but for the sick. Then I realized how I am that sick person who needs healing -- not only physically, but spiritually. God showed me how I don't have it all together -- how I'm broken and wounded, and how much I need His healing. I used to think that with going into ministry I was on this super-spiritual level, having the whole "I have to save the world" syndrome. However, God showed me that it's not even about me saving people. I need Him just as much as that rowdy kid who never stops talking during a Bible study. I need Christ as much as that man on the street, pushing his grocery cart filled with all his earthly possessions, sleeping on the stairs of my church. I need Jesus as much as that Haitian orphan, who has no home, no family, no place to go. I need God just as much as that adamant atheist who mocks my faith when I try to share with him the best news ever. I need Him as much as that tyrant dictator who has killed so many innocent people.
The essence of the Gospel message is receiving. We must realize that we can't do anything to earn God's love and forgiveness, and simply be open to receiving the free gift He's already given us through Christ's sacrifice. As others cared for me in Israel, this Gospel truth came to life for me in tangible ways. I want this essential truth to be the center of my life. Sadly, in ministry this basic truth can get pushed aside as I try to do things in my own strength instead of seeing how God's grace is made perfect in my weakness. It's in this very place of weakness that effective ministry takes place. We're all broken people, in need of a Savior. Ministry is about coming alongside others, as we look to the One who ultimately heals our brokeness.
"To give is better than to receive," is a statement our mothers taught us growing up so that we would be good, generous people. It is a true statement, but at the same time, there is a place for receiving. Being in the Holy Land was a powerful experience, and I will take all of the sights and sounds of Israel with me for life. Yet, the most memorable experience of the trip for me was the lesson of receiving.
A few days before the end of the trip, along with many others in our group, I came down with the stomach flu. During this time, I had to depend on others to care for me. My roommate got me water, crackers, bread -- all the essentials for someone on a limited diet due to the stomach flu. She even did my last-minute souvenir shopping. People checked up on me, took pictures and videos for me, gave me massages, encouraged and prayed for me. I was greatly blessed by the love I felt by the members of our group while I was sick, and realized that this is what it means for the body of Christ to function as the family of God.
Thankfully, the resort we stayed at in En Gev was situated right along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, so I was able to enjoy the beautiful view from my bedroom window. Lying there looking at the Sea of Galilee, I meditated on how Jesus came not for the well, but for the sick. Then I realized how I am that sick person who needs healing -- not only physically, but spiritually. God showed me how I don't have it all together -- how I'm broken and wounded, and how much I need His healing. I used to think that with going into ministry I was on this super-spiritual level, having the whole "I have to save the world" syndrome. However, God showed me that it's not even about me saving people. I need Him just as much as that rowdy kid who never stops talking during a Bible study. I need Christ as much as that man on the street, pushing his grocery cart filled with all his earthly possessions, sleeping on the stairs of my church. I need Jesus as much as that Haitian orphan, who has no home, no family, no place to go. I need God just as much as that adamant atheist who mocks my faith when I try to share with him the best news ever. I need Him as much as that tyrant dictator who has killed so many innocent people.
The essence of the Gospel message is receiving. We must realize that we can't do anything to earn God's love and forgiveness, and simply be open to receiving the free gift He's already given us through Christ's sacrifice. As others cared for me in Israel, this Gospel truth came to life for me in tangible ways. I want this essential truth to be the center of my life. Sadly, in ministry this basic truth can get pushed aside as I try to do things in my own strength instead of seeing how God's grace is made perfect in my weakness. It's in this very place of weakness that effective ministry takes place. We're all broken people, in need of a Savior. Ministry is about coming alongside others, as we look to the One who ultimately heals our brokeness.
Saturday, April 3, 2010
5 Years is a Long Time
"5 years is a long time."
~A quote from Nancy's and my quotebook from 3rd year of college...
I was looking through all my albums on facebook today. It's true that a picture is worth a 1000 words. It's amazing how powerful pictures are and how much it can capture. As I reflect on the past 5 years, I am amazed at God's faithfulness to me through it all. Where was I 5 years ago? I was still a senior in high school, getting ready to graduate, excited for the adventure of UCLA that awaited me.
In this 5 year time span I have: Graduated high school. Graduated college. Started seminary. Travelled to 12 countries. Became a choir director and youth worker at church.
It's pretty crazy to see God's hand throughout my life: changing my direction, from doing my own will to following His will...changing my heart: breaking me free from bondage...helping me enjoy Him supremely. It's encouraging to me to see His faithfulness to me despite my lack of faith so many times, and it's encouraging to me to see how He's grown me through these years - because I often get frustrated at myself for not being "fully sanctified" now. But it's true - we are all in process, and I am in process.
I've seen family and friends graduate from high school, graduate from college, move to different countries, go to grad school, get married, have kids, watch their kids grow older. It's interesting to see how much can change in 5 years or even in 1 year or even in 1 day.
The thing that I realized throughout this whole reflection is how God has brought amazing people in my life to walk alongside of me through this journey - to love me, encourage me, help me, teach me, laugh with me, cry with me. I have learned so much from the community He has given me about His love and grace, and I know I would not be the person I am today without all of you. I am so thankful for my friends who have become my family as we are all one in Christ. I am thankful for y'all, dear friends.
And now, as I look forward to the next 5 years and the new adventures God has in store for me, I await eagerly and expectantly...trusting in His faithfulness...and even though I don't know where the road will take me, I'll take one step at a time as I surrender my will to His perfect plan.
Happy Resurrection Weekend! Let's celebrate our Risen Savior and Lord! woot! partay!
~A quote from Nancy's and my quotebook from 3rd year of college...
I was looking through all my albums on facebook today. It's true that a picture is worth a 1000 words. It's amazing how powerful pictures are and how much it can capture. As I reflect on the past 5 years, I am amazed at God's faithfulness to me through it all. Where was I 5 years ago? I was still a senior in high school, getting ready to graduate, excited for the adventure of UCLA that awaited me.
In this 5 year time span I have: Graduated high school. Graduated college. Started seminary. Travelled to 12 countries. Became a choir director and youth worker at church.
It's pretty crazy to see God's hand throughout my life: changing my direction, from doing my own will to following His will...changing my heart: breaking me free from bondage...helping me enjoy Him supremely. It's encouraging to me to see His faithfulness to me despite my lack of faith so many times, and it's encouraging to me to see how He's grown me through these years - because I often get frustrated at myself for not being "fully sanctified" now. But it's true - we are all in process, and I am in process.
I've seen family and friends graduate from high school, graduate from college, move to different countries, go to grad school, get married, have kids, watch their kids grow older. It's interesting to see how much can change in 5 years or even in 1 year or even in 1 day.
The thing that I realized throughout this whole reflection is how God has brought amazing people in my life to walk alongside of me through this journey - to love me, encourage me, help me, teach me, laugh with me, cry with me. I have learned so much from the community He has given me about His love and grace, and I know I would not be the person I am today without all of you. I am so thankful for my friends who have become my family as we are all one in Christ. I am thankful for y'all, dear friends.
And now, as I look forward to the next 5 years and the new adventures God has in store for me, I await eagerly and expectantly...trusting in His faithfulness...and even though I don't know where the road will take me, I'll take one step at a time as I surrender my will to His perfect plan.
Happy Resurrection Weekend! Let's celebrate our Risen Savior and Lord! woot! partay!
Friday, March 12, 2010
Recording Sesh.
Had a good recording Sesh last Monday with "Team Glasses" now changing our name to "C is for Cookie." Recorded the song I wrote, "Terraces Will Be Destroyed." We laid down the guitar tracks and the vocal tracks. We still have to add drums and bass. I'll post it once we're done.
If you want to know where I got the name, "Terraces Will Be Destroyed" from, watch this video. I got it from our tour guide at Neot Kedumim Biblical gardens when she was explaining the importance of agriculture in Israel.
I'm currently writing a blurb about Israel for The Steadfast, our school newsletter. I'm looking at pictures and videos from our trip, and it makes me miss Israel. It seems so long ago even though it was only two months ago. It happened so fast, it almost feels like a dream. I can't believe I was in the Holy Land. It still blows my mind. We're having a Talbot chapel dedicated to the Israel trip. I'm excited to remember, reminisce, and share about our trip with the student body and see the Talbot Lands Israel fam.
If you want to know where I got the name, "Terraces Will Be Destroyed" from, watch this video. I got it from our tour guide at Neot Kedumim Biblical gardens when she was explaining the importance of agriculture in Israel.
I'm currently writing a blurb about Israel for The Steadfast, our school newsletter. I'm looking at pictures and videos from our trip, and it makes me miss Israel. It seems so long ago even though it was only two months ago. It happened so fast, it almost feels like a dream. I can't believe I was in the Holy Land. It still blows my mind. We're having a Talbot chapel dedicated to the Israel trip. I'm excited to remember, reminisce, and share about our trip with the student body and see the Talbot Lands Israel fam.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Guess Who?
So I finally have a little bit of time to blog.
Wow, how is it already March?
This past month has been a whirlwind. So many things happened. And now I am tired.
A sweet highlight for the month: Heading up to Sac-town to visit Yen with Keo, Easter, and Jessica, and spending the weekend at a cabin up in Truckee. It was quite an adventure getting there, but I am so thankful that I got to spend time with those lovely ladies. So refreshing. Snow makes me happy.
I've been camped out in the book of Genesis lately in my Pentateuch class. Good stuff. Thought-provoking. Dysfunctional families everywhere. God's faithfulness everywhere. I actually wrote poems of different characters in the O.T. last semeseter - I actually intended these to be hardcore song lyrics. You can guess who these portraits are supposed to be from:
She dazzled me with her eyes
So bright they stung me.
With a door cracked open she bid me come
In a voice so sweet with her pomegranate lips.
Shut the door.
I will not go near.
Shut the door.
Don't bid me come.
Run to a safe place fom here.
Run away from her.
"Come lay with me."
She steps out and seals my lips with that fatal kiss.
Run, run, as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm a God-fearing man.
She grabs my coat.
Run. Flee.
I left my favorite jacket at her doorstep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You called me
Even when I was still in the womb.
This is my destiny -
To speak Your words
Because it consumes and burns
From the core of my being.
I have to speak,
or else it'll kill me if don't.
I loved her, but You didn't let me
marry the one who's beauty blinded me.
There's no time for this.
Soon the walls will come tumbling down.
Yes, the walls will come tumbling down.
The pieces of pottery cracked and broken.
The walls came tumbling down.
Judgment day has come.
It's the Day of the Lord.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fire and brimstone came down that day
Because they didn't turn from their wicked ways.
Perversion filled the streets
Worshipping false gods and eating idolatrous meat.
The scale tipped -
And judgment came.
Immorality is not a joke.
Take me away from this God-forsaken place.
I don't want to turn into a pillar of salt
Even if I want an occasional drink.
Wow, how is it already March?
This past month has been a whirlwind. So many things happened. And now I am tired.
A sweet highlight for the month: Heading up to Sac-town to visit Yen with Keo, Easter, and Jessica, and spending the weekend at a cabin up in Truckee. It was quite an adventure getting there, but I am so thankful that I got to spend time with those lovely ladies. So refreshing. Snow makes me happy.
I've been camped out in the book of Genesis lately in my Pentateuch class. Good stuff. Thought-provoking. Dysfunctional families everywhere. God's faithfulness everywhere. I actually wrote poems of different characters in the O.T. last semeseter - I actually intended these to be hardcore song lyrics. You can guess who these portraits are supposed to be from:
She dazzled me with her eyes
So bright they stung me.
With a door cracked open she bid me come
In a voice so sweet with her pomegranate lips.
Shut the door.
I will not go near.
Shut the door.
Don't bid me come.
Run to a safe place fom here.
Run away from her.
"Come lay with me."
She steps out and seals my lips with that fatal kiss.
Run, run, as fast as you can. You can't catch me, I'm a God-fearing man.
She grabs my coat.
Run. Flee.
I left my favorite jacket at her doorstep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You called me
Even when I was still in the womb.
This is my destiny -
To speak Your words
Because it consumes and burns
From the core of my being.
I have to speak,
or else it'll kill me if don't.
I loved her, but You didn't let me
marry the one who's beauty blinded me.
There's no time for this.
Soon the walls will come tumbling down.
Yes, the walls will come tumbling down.
The pieces of pottery cracked and broken.
The walls came tumbling down.
Judgment day has come.
It's the Day of the Lord.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fire and brimstone came down that day
Because they didn't turn from their wicked ways.
Perversion filled the streets
Worshipping false gods and eating idolatrous meat.
The scale tipped -
And judgment came.
Immorality is not a joke.
Take me away from this God-forsaken place.
I don't want to turn into a pillar of salt
Even if I want an occasional drink.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Songwriting Spree.
So I'm currently on a songwriting spree before school gets too hectic:
I guess I've been inspired by alot lately - by Israel, and by evacuations...
so here's a song I wrote the week I came back from Israel:
Glory to God in the Highest
and I just wrote a song right now about being a stranger on this earth...
i'll upload the video sometime soon...
I guess I've been inspired by alot lately - by Israel, and by evacuations...
so here's a song I wrote the week I came back from Israel:
Glory to God in the Highest
and I just wrote a song right now about being a stranger on this earth...
i'll upload the video sometime soon...
Monday, February 8, 2010
Hummingbird, So Small, I See You.
So I wrote a song about hummingbirds...hahahah....yeah...i know many of you will probably laugh because I sure did...That's o.k. I don't really take anything too seriously...But I have to admit, I was completely sincere when I wrote this song...I was singing, "His Eye is on the Sparrow" and it made me want to write a song...I think just listening to it now makes me think, "Wow, I can't believe I wrote a song about hummingbirds and threw in some biological trivia in there that I got from wikipedia...hahahah." It's the T coming out of my INTJ self...as i analyze and make fun of myself for allowing myself to feel because i used to make fun of sappy chick flicks as my friends were bawling their eyes out...
but i'm learning how to feel as i understand God's love in greater ways and am overjoyed at His love for me. so it's a good thing- learning how to feel.
quite a change from "terraces will be destroyed." haha...but yeah i guess i'm multi-faceted like that...haha. i generally dislike showing my "feeling" side and try to put up my walls of sarcasm and laughter to show that i have a tough exterior...like singing songs about judgment day...but i guess this song reveals that i do have a heart...
It's funny how I wrote this right before I was evacuated again...making me realize how God cares for me even as I am a transient on this earth. I'm learning the hard way. Praise God, I'm now back at home, but will probably keep my stuff packed for awhile since I don't know when I'll be evacuated again.
here's the video:
there are the lyrics:
Hummingbird, so small, I see you
Reminding me that God's love is true
You fly so fast, I barely see the motion of your wings
A buzzing sound, it's the music that rings.
You fly so freely
In the sky, so dearly
You show me that I am free
Because God sent down His Son for me.
Hummingbird, so small, I see you.
Hummingbird, so small, I see you.
Drinking of the nectar for food,
You drink so much, consuming more than your weight each day.
Constantly going, God provides a way.
~I should probably thank Eufemio for letting me use his ideas for this song since I pretty much stole them...give credit where credit is due...thanks :)
but i'm learning how to feel as i understand God's love in greater ways and am overjoyed at His love for me. so it's a good thing- learning how to feel.
quite a change from "terraces will be destroyed." haha...but yeah i guess i'm multi-faceted like that...haha. i generally dislike showing my "feeling" side and try to put up my walls of sarcasm and laughter to show that i have a tough exterior...like singing songs about judgment day...but i guess this song reveals that i do have a heart...
It's funny how I wrote this right before I was evacuated again...making me realize how God cares for me even as I am a transient on this earth. I'm learning the hard way. Praise God, I'm now back at home, but will probably keep my stuff packed for awhile since I don't know when I'll be evacuated again.
here's the video:
there are the lyrics:
Hummingbird, so small, I see you
Reminding me that God's love is true
You fly so fast, I barely see the motion of your wings
A buzzing sound, it's the music that rings.
You fly so freely
In the sky, so dearly
You show me that I am free
Because God sent down His Son for me.
Hummingbird, so small, I see you.
Hummingbird, so small, I see you.
Drinking of the nectar for food,
You drink so much, consuming more than your weight each day.
Constantly going, God provides a way.
~I should probably thank Eufemio for letting me use his ideas for this song since I pretty much stole them...give credit where credit is due...thanks :)
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