It's Greek to Me.

Finished my first year of seminary.

Lasted through Vacation Bible School. Lots of kids. Crazy. Hectic. Fun. Church body working together.

Survived 2 weeks of suicide Greek. Just 5 more to go. This is gonna be a long summer. Our study group is amazing. Fun times partying it up in the library. hah.

And I've had some time to play. Yay.

God is gracious.

Jesus loves me.

<3.

I know this is where He wants me to be.

Thanks for your prayers.

Letting the Red In.

So I finally bought a Biola sweatshirt, since it was on sale for 35% off. Although I will always be a true Bruin at heart and will always proudly wear my blue and gold, I did buy a red Biola sweatshirt. I figured I'm going to spend the next 3 years there, the same amount I spent at UCLA, so I might as well buy a sweatshirt. I was thinking about buying a Talbot sweatshirt, but I didn't really like the design as much, so I ended up just getting a normal Biola university sweatshirt. I feel very undergradish wearing it, and I probably look very much like an undergrad wearing it. Well, I am supposed to still be an undergrad at the very young age of 22.

I'm 22 and a seminary student. Weird.

Surrender - A difficult yet freeing experience. Still trying to figure out how to do it.

Although seminary's alot of work and studying, which can get stressful at times (especially when I have 40 pages of written work due in one week), I truly do enjoy it at the core of my being. I love delving into God's Word as it challenges my heart and my mind.

At one point in time this past semester, I was so excited about studying God's Word that it made me want to dance. (I think I might've been doing homework in the Psalms for hermeneutics.) So I put on some Israel Houghton, shut the door of my room, and just danced for joy. Danced like David danced. Undignified.

I told my fellow PT 709ers about this experience, and one guy, Ben, said he got a picture of me being like those little kids who have the toy of trying to put the correct shape in the right hole, and that for a while, I was trying different holes, but now I finally put the shape in the right hole, and it's brought me great joy, just as that kid who puts the shape in the right hole gets really happy.

I agree - Discovering more about how God has made me and how I can use the way He has gifted me for His glory.

And that PT 709 class is amazing. I love the transparency and prayer that goes on in there. Those people are so cool.

Community: another reason why seminary's such a sweet experience. Learning from people and being with people who are passionate for God and His Word. Good times.

Prayer request: I'm going to take a year's worth of Greek in the span of six weeks this summer. (They call it suicide Greek for a reason. ahhhh) haha. And the first week of summer school is VBS at my church which I'm heading up....so....yeah, I need lots of prayer :) Thanks.

Tidbits.

So I was reading some articles today, and found some interesting quotes...

"Sacrificial service in the church doesn't start with serving. It starts with being served by God. Then as we are satisfied in Him and who He's revealed Himself to be in His crucified Son, we gladly overflow in service of others. "
~David Mathis, "Served by God, Serving Man"

"I'm finally beginning to realize that I cannot show others the truth about God until I tell myself the truth about His unconditional love.
Can I urge you to do something? Ask Him to tell you about it. Make it your job to hear about it, to immerse yourself in it, to pursue a deeper knowledge of it. Ask others how they know they are unconditionally loved by God. Study the Bible on this subject. Draw pictures, sing songs, tell stories, tell others — whatever it takes to cement this truth in your heart."

"I can't always explain why I do or don't fall in love with someone; how can I expect this of someone else? The good news is that regardless of its romantic potential, each relationship is an excuse for prayer. If it results in faith for someone's purity, well-being, and godliness, even a five-second crush can be a way to expand the Kingdom of God."
~Elisabeth Adams, "One Single Day"

Update on My Life.

(Photo caption: With some Epic Japan project people after the Chris Tomlin concert)

So I've decided to do an update on my life:

-I love it at Talbot. The people there are amazing! From students to faculty, I have felt welcomed and encouraged by their authenticity and open hearts. It's starting to feel like my second home now. (And it probably will be for the like next 5 years...haha.) God is faithful in answering my prayer about community. I love my classes and studying God's Word. My mind and heart have been challenged in so many different ways. It truly is a privilege to study there.

On that note, I'm in the process of changing my program - probably to an M.A. in Biblical Exposition. I realized this program fits me well, since I love learning languages and analyzing texts. Here is where my English major nerdiness fits. haha. I also have been more convicted about the great power there is in God's Word and my very limited understanding of it. It's interesting because I feel like the more I learn in seminary, the more I realize how little I know.

On another side note, meeting up with Erin at Biola every week has been such a blessing to me. It makes me see how God is so gracious in allowing me to see her grow in Him, and how awesome it is that He orchestrated this whole thing.

-I'm enjoying serving at my church, and God continues to give me the grace and joy in ministry. He has provided a super encouraging team of awesome people who serve alongside with me. I also learn alot about through watching children's joy, trust, faith, and simplicity. Teaching high school students has also been a humbling experience as I continue to recognize my own inadequacies and God's grace in supplying all my needs.

Conducting choir has been alot of fun too, and it's just amazing listening to lovely voices worship God. I also started taking voice lessons, which has been quite enlightening, since my voice teacher told me I was a soprano, after singing alto all my life. haha. Who knew? But now that I'm learning how to sing properly, I actually enjoy singing soprano more. :)

-I still don't really know what I'm doing after graduate school, but I'm learning how to be o.k. with this fact. I realized this week that I'm really young - a mere 21, on the verge of 22, and if God wills it, I have my whole life ahead of me. So for now, I'll enjoy the present, and trust God to guide me each step of the way. (It has actually been a difficult process for me to get to this point, as I have the tendency to plan my whole life out and want to take control.)

-Even in the midst of studies and ministry, I have had fun times this past week...going to Disneyland twice, seeing Chris Tomlin live, and running into some Epic Japan project people. God is so good! Again, He reminds me of the great community that He's given me and how privileged I am to have sweet times with friends!

Snow Falls Fast. It Makes Me Smile :)

The beauty of snow.
White, powdery, fresh.
A blanket I'd cover myself in
If it weren't for the cold and watery slush.

Snow man -
I made you
With your leafy limbs and stony eyes.
You stand to show me my frailty,
As you melt in the sun.

I'm happy today
Basking in the rays
Of the sun that's as bright
As a mirror blinding me with its light.

Farewell. It was a pleasure to meet you.
I'll see you again one day.

Out of the Depths.

New favorite song from Sovereign Grace's Psalms CD.

Out of the Depths
by Bob Kauflin

Verse 1
Out of the depths, O Lord, I cry to You.
When I am tempted to despair.
Though I might fail to trust Your promises,
You never fail to hear my prayer.
And if you judged my sin,
I'd never stand again,
But I see mercy in Your hands.

Chorus
So more than watchmen for the morning,
I will wait for You, my God.
When my fears come with no warning,
in Your Word I'll put my trust.
When the harvest time is over and I still see no fruit,
I will wait, I will wait for You.

Verse 2
The secret mysteries belong to You.
We only know what You reveal.
And all my questions that are unresolved
Don't change the wisdom of Your will.
In every trial and loss my hope is in the cross
Where your compassions never fail.

Roses have no scent: Musings from my front lawn.

"Stop and smell the roses," they always say. So I did that today. But I couldn't really smell anything. Maybe it's because I have a slight cold. But I took some deep breaths, and still, nothing. So I moved on to the next flowers - sampaguita - a quite pungeunt smell. I walked around the garden in my front yard and smelled the flowers. I don't think I've ever done that before, even after living at this house for 20 years of my life. Maybe I have, during those childhood days when I used to turn the small front-yard garden into a tropical rainforest, where behind each bush rustling, there was a tiger or a zebra or an elephant. But those days are gone now.

Anyways, I sat on my front lawn for the first time in over a year. One or two cars passed by, but it wasn't even really on my street. There were no people walking around. I guess that's how it is in the middle of the day in the suburbs. I could hear the gentle trickle of my neighbor's man-made waterfall, or was that just a hose leaking? The light and airy breeze flowed through the windchimes, making an undistinguished melody. I could hear the faraway sound of the freeway and the whizz of a motorcycle, or maybe that was some kind of gardening tool? A lawnmower to keep the grass cut and straight. Front lawns have to be maintained in the suburbs. Otherwise, the city complains.

I miss the sound of the tricycles, the motorcycles, the jipneys that whizz by. I miss the sound of my titas cooking, washing, and laughing. I miss the delicious food, the fresh vegetables and fruits, papayas just picked from our backyard, the fresh meat just killed that day. I miss the smell of burning trash and the sound of roosters crowing at daybreak. I miss the chicks that chirp and hide behind the mother hen. I miss the ducks who wander. I miss the bark of the dogs and the poor three-legged dog that watches out for strangers. I miss the constant flow of people who come and eat, taking a merienda, to just sit and chat for awhile. I miss the slow pace of life - the time to talk and kuwento, time to listen, and play cards. listening to the lives of my family, the happy, the masaya days of their youth, and the hardship of just trying to survive in a land where $5/day is the normal income.

I miss the Philippines.